Now I'm going to treat myself for Vaginal Thrush...

with a tub of yoghurt, a pineapple and a pirate's hook.
if you want to get this joke and other gems...go see 'IDIOT BOX'.

Australian Idol's Guy Sebastian: I'm...still a virgin...that means i've never slept with a girl...boys don't count.

The biggest Loser: "Hi, my name is Chan, and i study IT at UTS and i play computer games all time...my hero is 'studmuffin warrior' Yeah, i don't know his real name but he so cool. He play game all day - no life, no friends, no ambition. that what i want to be."

The biggest Loser: "my name is melinda, but i changed it recently to 'Aura chinese character Feng shui'. Um...my biggest hero is my boyfriend because he's in a band. Well, he's not so much in a band as he just plays guitar. Well, he not so much plays guitar as he doesn't play guitar. And he's not so much my boyfriend."

OH, and a great ad about a GIANT sanitary pad..."OMG! it is big..."

• WHERE: newtown theatre
• DATE: march 15, 16, 17,18 at 10pm
• PRICE: $20/$15 (concession)
• TICKETS: MCA 1300 306 77
  www.mca-tix.com
  www.newtowntheatre.com.au